Meet: Peter Atkinson

PETER ATKINSON is a NYC-based actor and teacher. (petercalvinatkinson.com and peteatkinson@gmail.com)

CATHOLIC ARTIST CONNECTION (CAC): What brought you to NYC, and where did you come from?

PETER ATKINSON (PA): I came to NYC in Fall 2017, to train in Columbia University’s MFA Acting program. For two years before that, I was founding a Shakespearean theater program down in Florida at a Catholic high school. Eventually I realized I needed to be practicing the craft and not just teaching it!

CAC: How do understand your vocation as a Catholic artist? What do you see as your personal mission as a Catholic working in the arts?

PA: I think that art helps us encounter our interior wounds in a visceral way. Without God, that artistic encounter with those wounds either turns to nihilism or to a mistaken celebration of those wounds (without calling them wounds). I think our faith is challenging us to encounter those wounds, call them by name, and remain with those wounds as God heals us. (Without a spiritual director or a spiritual community to support this, I’ve found it almost impossible to do that!)

I love theater because it can expose the raw condition of humanity - our great need for love and acceptance, the horrible things we do to try and fill that hole, the beautiful potential for self-sacrificial love and redemption. What is most beautiful to me is when Jesus surprises us by meeting that need with his own presence.

If anything, I hope that my work renews in people the hope that their hearts might be fulfilled. It’s certainly been my experience that my journey in the arts has led to a deeper healing of my heart and a continuing encounter with God through the Catholic faith.

I suppose that being an artist is about being authentically present in the world in a revealing, vulnerable way - and hopefully, if you’re a Catholic, that would necessarily communicate your yearning for God, right?

CAC: Where have you found support in the Church for your vocation as an artist?

PA: Cole Matson was a wonderful welcoming presence in the city. Because of his Catholic Artists NYC meet-up, I worked with a Catholic playwright, ended up reading for a director, and starred in an off-broadway show at the Sheen Center!

Storm Theatre has been a huge support, as they cast me as Richard in their production of ‘Ah, Wilderness!’ at the Sheen Center. It was incredible to leave rehearsal and be able to stop in the Sheen Center’s chapel to pray for a bit afterwards.

Quite a few priests have been incredibly supportive as well - both in spiritual direction, mentorship, hosting readings of plays, etc. etc. I’m so grateful to the spiritual community that the Church has provided for me.

Additionally, if I wasn’t living at Ford Hall, I’m not sure I could afford the city! Ford Hall is a Catholic house for graduate students at Columbia University. We have the Eucharist in the chapel in our upper room, Mass said weekly in the house, and the cost of living is subsidized somewhat. Ford Hall has given me a Catholic family to come back to in NYC.

CAC: Where have you found support among your fellow artists for your Catholic faith?

PA: Almost all of my fellow artists in NYC are not Catholic. Pretty much all of them have been extremely respectful of my faith, though there have been some instances of being yelled at in disbelief that I believed in God when they saw my Ash Wednesday ashes.

I’ve found that the artistic training has deepened my experience of my faith and of prayer, regardless of the personal beliefs of any given teacher. Most of my experience has been that professional actors and artists are more interested in the craft and creating a piece of work than in condemning your faith.

One of my classmates actually came to Ash Wednesday Mass with me this past week - it’s a gift to be able to befriend fellow artists and witness to the 'normalcy’ (in a sense) of Catholicism. I think many lapsed Catholic have been 'burned’ by their experience of faith and of religious institutions and simply befriending them and sharing life with them can be a powerful witness to the goodness of the Catholic faith.

But, fundamentally, I don’t look to fellow artists to support my faith as much as I depend on my faith (particularly in Eucharistic adoration) to be the bedrock of my life.

CAC: How can the Church be more welcoming to artists?

PA: Pay artists attention. That’s it.

Whether it’s through paying artists financially, hosting get-togethers for artists to connect, having priests and religious preach about art, or whatever - making artists feel important and heard in the cultural life of the Church is fundamental.

But I don’t mean the liturgy. Often people think “art in the Church” means felt banners or Gregorian chant - but since 90% of a Catholic’s life is spent outside the Church’s walls, it’s important to nurture a Catholic culture in the marketplace, on Broadway, and in schools, etc.

I think one a major shift in American Catholicism has been the Magnificat, published by the Dominicans. Because of its focus on art, hundreds of thousands of Catholics are contemplating pieces of the artistic vision of the faith every week. They’ve had many reflections about the importance of being an artist and the artistic vocation - it’s been incredibly useful and encouraging!

CAC: How can the artistic world be more welcoming to artists of faith?

PA: Don’t equate politics with religion or religion with politics. When people assume that they fully understand a person’s views or feelings because of their creed, there’s no room for relationship, much less conversation.

However, my experience has actually been very positive. Most every person I’ve met has been welcoming of my faith and curious about my beliefs.

But perhaps if the art world didn’t caricature every religious group that it encounters, that might be an improvement. I think that theater could do a better job of taking the big questions seriously. Right now my impression is that there’s a continual wallowing in pleasurable nihilism. I totally get it - it’s an option. But it’s not my choice and I’d like to hear some voices that propose real, challenging answers to questions like: is there a purpose to life? Is there evil? How can God be good in this world of suffering?

Those would make for some good drama. Right now it can sometimes feel like every New York theater show has a predictable set of moral conclusions it must reach. It would be refreshing and challenging to see a show that held open the possibility of God, wasn’t caught in some predetermined Hegelian idea of progressive history, and maybe thought that maybe Freud wasn’t the greatest.

But that might just be me!

CAC: Where in NYC do you regularly find spiritual fulfillment? Do you participate in any church groups you would recommend to others?

PA: Because I live in Ford Hall, I am lucky enough to have Jesus as my roommate. Just down the hall there is a chapel with the Eucharist present, where I pray morning and evening prayer. Having a Catholic family to live with has been a beautiful gift to have in NYC. I also teach CCD at Annunciation Parish on Convent Avenue which is right across from my studios. And my spiritual director at Xavier Parish has been incredible for me.

I would encourage any Catholic in NYC to teach CCD at a Church near them. It only takes a few hours on Sunday and it constantly reminds me of how powerful learning about the faith can be. Without passing on the faith, some of these kids would never have the chance to come to know God - it’s such a gift to help pass it on!

CAC: Where in NYC do you regularly find artistic fulfillment? Where do you go to get inspired?

PA: Training at Columbia University has been my main artistic work in the city for some time. Since I started my MFA program in 2017, I’ve been working 9-5pm every day to deepen my work. Besides that, I’ve been lucky enough to help teach at the Atlantic Theater Company and worked with a few theater companies in the city.

I’ve also trained as a teaching artist at Roundabout Theatre in Times Square. Their educational program is incredible! I’m traveling to a few schools over Spring Break to help teach workshops in classrooms, using Roundabout’s work as a framework for these schools.

To get inspired, I simply slow down and meditate. A meditation practice in NYC is - for me - essential. It’s counter-intuitive to the pace NYC asks you to run at, but it’s essential with getting back in touch with your own heart and humanity.

CAC: How have you found or built community as a Catholic artist living in NYC?

PA: Ford Hall has been a god-send. But besides that, I’ve gone to theology on tap, a few summer Love and Responsibility talks, and other events. The young adult mailing list for the archdiocese is great and there are simply too many events to attend - but make as many as you can!

CAC: What is your daily spiritual practice? And if you have a spiritual director, how did you find that person?

PA: I get up at 5am and try to spend one holy hour in Eucharistic adoration. Often I’ll journal, read two books that I’m working my way through, and read a selection of the Bible (I’m trying to read through it in one year!).

My spiritual director is at Xavier Parish and I simply pulled him aside after Mass for confession - I’ve always been fearless about grabbing priests for a quick confession. Well, within 5 minutes both of us were weeping and we both felt the presence of the Holy Spirit, so I figured I should probably stick with this guy for a while and emailed him later to be my confessor. It’s been a wonderful gift!

CAC: What is your daily artistic practice? And what are your recommendations to other artists for practicing their craft daily?

PA: I do a one hour vocal or physical warm-up every day, usually led by a Columbia University teacher. It’s based in either Feldenkrais movement work or in Linklater vocal work. I also record every single one, so I have over one hundred warm-ups recorded. I’m preparing for graduation day, so that I can just listen to the warm-up recordings and use them to continue my warm-up practice throughout my life.

But I think the single most important practice is 'arriving exercises’ or meditation practice. Anything to get you present in your body and out of the judgmental frame of mind.

CAC: Describe a recent day in which you were most completely living out your vocation as an artist. What happened, and what brought you the most joy?

PA: Hoo boy - well, I guess this would have been when I was performing in 'Ah, Wilderness!’ I woke up, went to a men’s prayer group up town, came back down and had lunch with some Catholic friends who were visiting from out of town, and then performed two shows back to back!

I think the most joy I had was in registering how much progress I’ve made in my craft since I came to the city. It’s easy to be discouraged as an artist in the city - or anywhere I guess - but it’s truly gratifying to see how years of work start to enable you to artistically do things that you couldn’t do before.

Of course, there’s leagues to go before I’m anywhere near satisfied with my work (Martha Graham’s “divine dissatisfaction” amiright?) but that was an exciting day!

CAC: You actually live in NYC? How!?

PA: Living in Ford Hall helps with rent, meal planning for food, and never eating out. Harlem is a great area and the commute is totally fine.

I found Ford Hall through an undergraduate friend of mine who connected me. Use your connections in the city! Seriously - this city runs on personal connections.

CAC: But seriously, how do you make a living in NYC?

PA: I work two jobs while in graduate school - both jobs through Columbia University. I’m also launching an educational non-profit company right now, but that won’t be profitable for a few years anyways.

My hope is to make a full-time living from my art in about 5 years. Realistically, it takes time to build up reputation, get a network, and start to 'take off.’ Hopefully it’ll happen sooner, but I’m fine with being young, scrappy, and hungry for a while anyways.

CAC: How much would you suggest artists moving to NYC budget for their first year?

PA: You can make it by with about $25,000 - but that’s a huge struggle. I would say $30,000 realistically.

CAC: What other practical resources would you recommend to a Catholic artist living in NYC?

PA: Jordan Puhala is the best headshot photographer (she’s on facebook).

Ray’s Barbershop is the best barbershop. Email me for the best dentist, ENT doctor, podiatrist, and skin doctor - seriously. Or you could just use ZocDoc for that - it’s an incredible app to find doctors in NYC!

CAC: What are your top 3 pieces of advice for Catholic artists moving to NYC?

PA: 1. Research the Catholic groups in NYC before you come and reach out to find about events. NYC can be incredibly lonely when you get here first - find your people!

2. Know your finances really really well - once that’s not a stress-point, NYC gets a lot easier.

3. Get a spiritual director in the city! NYC is a hard city to live in sometimes - it’s loud, it’s brash, and it has every temptation known to man. Your spiritual life will either deepen *a lot* or get real shallow. Set yourself up to deepen your faith by getting resources to protect yourself with!